A 2025 Resolution

Give In Never Rarely Occasionally Sometimes Less Often than Previously

Rather than outline a handful of specific improvements I want to implement, or goals I wish to achieve in the coming year, I briefly want to discuss an overarching theme pervading my psyche, the way the smell of stale cabbage might pervade the air if you were to stubbornly hang on to said stale cabbage, despite its odor telling you not to. Btw, I only used the stale cabbage metaphor because it was the example Google gave when I checked to ensure I was appropriately utilizing the word pervade.

Back on topic, in general, I want to make better decisions. Better in the sense that they align more with my values (cocaine and titties) and result in less future regret (i.e., less titties and cocaine). The key words I want to speak or think less are Damn, I shouldn’t have done that.

Because I say these silly words all the time, in many situations, relating to matters such as my relationships, my health, my commitment to personal goals, my desire to be somewhat productive, and on and on. Typically, I end up thinking damn, I shouldn’t have done that due to my consistent lack of willpower. So that’s why I say for 2025, let’s toughen up, hold the line, and give in a little less often than previously to all those bad impulses and urges.

Some of my common regretful refrains:

Shouldn’t have eaten third dessert. Even if it’s physically well tolerated, mentally, it’s diabetes of the soul.

Shouldn’t have stayed up til 1AM. You dummy. Do you know horrible this is going to feel tomorrow? Yes, you do, and still, you stay up.

Shouldn’t have slept in 1.5 hours past my alarm and blown my only window for uninterrupted free time, where I’m not under the assault of those savages, my children.

Shouldn’t have skipped lifting weights. Merely upping your protein and ingesting creatine won’t make you a greek god. At baseline, you have a soft 4-pack at best. You could do better with even a little bit of effort. But you’d still be pasty as hell.

Shouldn’t have skipped the run, especially the hard and terrible ones. Springtime will come, and you may have goals, and you’ll wish you were fast and fit. Alas, you’re not that fast and fit, because you didn’t put in the prior effort. Tsk-tsk

Shouldn’t have wasted 2 hours on the site formerly known as Twitter. Sure, you go there under the pretense of getting the news and staying current on worldly happenings, but it invariably devolves into some culinary wizard making pizza soup, or something equally useful.

Shouldn’t have wasted 2 hours on the site formerly and still known as Youtube. At least in this case, you knew from the outset you were going there to avoid doing anything productive. And you succeeded at that.

Shouldn’t have gotten angry at the kids. That’s not teaching them anything good. And the little one, she’s an actual baby, dude. You sometimes imagine her machinations are diabolical, but I think you may be projecting some of your own ideas there.

Shouldn’t have argued with your wife. Fucking duh.

Shouldn’t have not called or texted your friends back. Fergin derr.

Shouldn’t have said no to that cocaine bump.

Shouldn’t have said no to dem titties.

Shouldn’t have held on to that stale cabbage for so damn long.

As an uplifting lil gem for your departure, below is a banger I came across recently. It starts off slow and somber, but picks up and transforms into a groove that I think is undeniably elevating and joyous. It’s as good as the last 30 seconds of Mr. Brightside. On a side note, imagine if The Killers changed the lyrics from “I never” to “I less often than previously.” I don’t think it would’ve hit the same. What a dumb blog post title.

Anyhow, I don’t know what the dying light is, but as the guy says in the song, you must repel it. Repel that shit, don’t give in, be better in 2025-for yourself and those you love. Byyye.