Category Archives: Uncategorized

Big Reflections

It’s fall. The days are shortening, the air is crispening, the colors are morphing, the leaves are falling. There is a palpable and present sense of transformation amongst us. Fall and its energy of change often inspires reflection. Many choose to pause and consider the patterns and habits of daily life and how they alignContinue reading “Big Reflections”

We Don’t Choose Our Feelings

I loved Grandma. When I first learned she died, I paused for a moment to reflect on the situation. I thought about my dad and wondered how he was feeling, knowing he just lost his mother. I’ll admit though, I wasn’t particularly sad. She was 91. The last several years of her life had beenContinue reading “We Don’t Choose Our Feelings”

Franny

There once was a band. Its name was Squish Rat. It was radical. It was unstoppable. But then it got stopped. By what? Good question. Too much talent? Definitely not. It was something other than that, but we’ll likely never know the actual answer. The song I’m about to share is like a charred andContinue reading “Franny”

Tryptamine

DMT is a helluva drug. Here’s an ode to wildest psychedelic out there. This one’s also a bit more introspective, emotional, and dare I say, serious, than the other songs I’ve uploaded. On the note of DMT, here is my semi-annual request to all my friends out there who might have access to some things:Continue reading “Tryptamine”

I Have A Problem With Math

It’s true, I do. Not a math problem, though. I’ve already solved this particular math problem. The solution was never in doubt. I’m also not saying that I struggle with math. I get by just fine with my mathing, thank you very much. What I’m saying is, I have a grievance with the subject ofContinue reading “I Have A Problem With Math”

Oops, I did it again

Ah man, for real? More music? Again, I’m sorry, but quit whining, and just giv ‘er a listen. This next track is very different from the last track I uploaded. Dare I say, it’s more in line with the soul feel of Yolo69420.blog, meaning it’s highly immature and sassy as hell. Backstory- basically, I tookContinue reading “Oops, I did it again”

Sorry, I Wrote More Music

I know, I know. Not what the readership is looking for in this blog, but I did, and now I’m obliged to share it. My apologies. It will definitely happen again though… So this is a tune I almost entirely wrote with the electronic piano preset on my keyboard. I had no agenda when IContinue reading “Sorry, I Wrote More Music”

The Captain and The Coke

Recently, an odd and random memory came to me. Now, my memory of the past is, by and large, shit. It’s extremely spotty. Usually when I become aware of something from my distant past, I’m fascinated because it’s like I’m recovering something lost, something so ancient that it feels like it doesn’t actually belong toContinue reading “The Captain and The Coke”

Banana Bread

Fate, I think for the most part, is horseshit. I simply don’t believe in it. Things happen circumstantially, not because of some predetermined destiny. Relationships, even incredible ones, are not the result of fate. Well, except for one. There is one known relationship in this universe that is so right, good, and harmonious that itsContinue reading “Banana Bread”

The Mother of All Endurance

Merriam Webster defines endurance as “the ability to withstand hardship or adversity.” It’s a wonderfully nonspecific definition, implying there are endless forms of endurance. Inspired by my wife’s recent birthday, I’d like to speak of a remarkable form of endurance I regularly witness from her and other moms. Dare I say, I’m pretty fit, andContinue reading “The Mother of All Endurance”

Don’t Alpha The Goose

I encountered a goose this morning. While still at a distance, but approaching its feathery ass, I could tell this thing was belligerent. The way it was postured 10 feet up on the retaining wall, standing at the edge, and overlooking its parking lot kingdom, I could sense that this bird was aggro. I thinkContinue reading “Don’t Alpha The Goose”

London Rain

Now it’s raining in London. Well, I don’t actually know that. But it probably is. Because London is a wet-ass place. It’s always raining up in them parts. In actuality, I’m quoting a song lyric from my latest track that I’m posting here, titled “London Rain.” What a name. Evocative. Provocative. Moody… Yes ma’am. InContinue reading “London Rain”

Politics: I’m Confused

If forced to summarize my take on our current political climate, it’s the following two words: I’m confused. Now, while I walk around at a baseline level of confusion, sometimes forgetting to breathe in air, or blink, or deliver food to the correct bodily orifice for proper delivery of nutrition, I have never been moreContinue reading “Politics: I’m Confused”

I Ain’t Your Friend

Not you of course, reader. You indeed are my friend. If you can stomach this blog and come back for more, I have nothing but love for you. But there are probably some other bitches out there who ain’t my friends. So I wrote a song for them. It’s called “I Ain’t Your Friend.” GoContinue reading “I Ain’t Your Friend”

Be F#%$ing Nicer

It is an act of niceness to censor the blog title, because I don’t want to offend any innocent cybercitizen pleasantly perusing the internet with such harsh language. Believe it or not, but in this very moment, I’m trying to be nicer. Fucking nicer. That’s a phrase I need to utter to myself daily: BeContinue reading “Be F#%$ing Nicer”

Forgive Me Father, For I Have Sinned

I came across this unpublished post from a couple years ago. Here’s an inspiring story about keeping the faith: Desperate times call for desperate measures.. It should be clear by now that I’m a dummy. Well, no surprise, I went and did another dumb thing. My wife, son, and I were on a little staycationContinue reading “Forgive Me Father, For I Have Sinned”

Goodbye Beanz

They say we kill what we love. I don’t have a damn clue who said that. I’m also not entirely sure that’s a well-known quote or saying, but I think it is, and I will not resort to Google to fact-check myself. Until recently, I didn’t even know what this allegedly popular saying meant. ButContinue reading “Goodbye Beanz”

A 2025 Resolution

Give In Never Rarely Occasionally Sometimes Less Often than Previously Rather than outline a handful of specific improvements I want to implement, or goals I wish to achieve in the coming year, I briefly want to discuss an overarching theme pervading my psyche, the way the smell of stale cabbage might pervade the air ifContinue reading “A 2025 Resolution”

Holiday Gratitude and a Christmas Song

This is going to be a bit strange.. Unlike the typical content circulated here, today’s post will be a semi-thoughtful, borderline mature, and possibly self-reflective blog post. Not the norm. Is something wrong with me? No, it’s just Christmas, and now’s the time of year to do this kinda shit, so let’s get it overContinue reading “Holiday Gratitude and a Christmas Song”

Eating a Humble Sandwich

People probably often wonder, How does Mr. Yolo69420.blog stay humble? Especially with all his blogging success, profound insight, and obvious interpersonal skills that make him the perennial center of attention in all situations-how does he do it? What can I say, I have a disposition towards humility. I try and understand that we all startContinue reading “Eating a Humble Sandwich”

My Father-In-Law’s Downstairs Bathroom

I would like to take a few brief minutes to discuss my father-in-law’s downstairs bathroom. It’s a place that has always puzzled and fascinated me. Over the 11 years I have pilgrimaged to that special place to leave my bio-organic offerings, there have been several changes I’ve noticed, as well as other conditions that stubbornlyContinue reading “My Father-In-Law’s Downstairs Bathroom”

How to Live Forever*

Mystics distinguish between the two concepts of eternity and foreverness, with eternity representing a timeless state, one that exists outside of our temporal experience, rather than basic, vanilla foreverness- time essentially going on and on and never stopping. Well, I’m no philosopher, and I do not wish to iron out these nuances. We Americans aren’tContinue reading “How to Live Forever*”

Chili Cook-Offs And The Physiological Limits of The Human Body

We(some of us, not all of us) humans push our physical bodies to incredible extremes- running 200+ miles in one push, climbing 8000 meter peaks without supplemental oxygen, holding a single breath of air for more than ten minutes, and the list goes on and on across many domains and disciplines. But what about merelyContinue reading “Chili Cook-Offs And The Physiological Limits of The Human Body”

Identifyyoself

It’s peak political season, so I feel a duty to comment on our current state of affairs. American politics is a disaster. This we all know. So rather than rail against all that is wrong with the current political climate, I’d like to focus on what is possibly one of the best features to ariseContinue reading “Identifyyoself”

The worst question ever asked

I remain haunted by a question. After years and years, it still occasionally bubbles up into the perimeters of my conscious mind and makes me shudder. For I still don’t have a good answer. There is no good or right answer. There is no winning. There is only losing. There are only wrong answers…. MyContinue reading “The worst question ever asked”

Vain(Vein) Motivation

Hi good people, I did a full-body manscape session recently, and I have some words about the experience. I did the works. The whole body hath been shaven. Trimmed the head hair. Shaved the face hair. Clipped the nose hair. Plucked the brow hair. Trimmed the ball hair. Considered thinning the chest hair, then thought,Continue reading “Vain(Vein) Motivation”

You Can Do Better

This is a post for myself more than a message to anyone else. Lately, I’ve been disappointed in my own self-discipline. The truth is, I have not been exercising my will-power as much as I should, and it has resulted in me wasting lots and lots of time. So here is a message to myself,Continue reading “You Can Do Better”

Never Make A Date With An Avocado

The Avocado is the most fickle of beings. She’s temperamental and unpredictable, to the point of cruelty. She will lead you on. She will make you fantasize. .. Then she will shut you down. She’ll pull the rug out from under you, leaving you penniless and horny (in hunger-like kind of way, at least). ThereContinue reading “Never Make A Date With An Avocado”

Idiotic Logic

I fear people will see me as an idiot. For what I do. For what I say. For what I write. For how I act. For what I create and contribute. But also, I am a harsh judge of others. I’d say I’m fair and objective, but maybe lacking some compassion. Honestly, I think manyContinue reading “Idiotic Logic”

See Your Potential! …. And Then, Do Nothing

Envision the future. Your future. Yo dang momma’s future. Earth’s future. Contemplate how drastically different things could be compared to the present moment, if you only maximized your potential. Think about that. Think about maximation. Feel maximization in your bones. But do not maximize. Just think about it. Imagine your life transformed. Conceptualize the worldContinue reading “See Your Potential! …. And Then, Do Nothing”

Miss Big Booty Deschutee

5/22/24 Author’s Note- Just a quick update, I’ve been having fun creating AI-generated images for some of my blog posts. Am I good prompt engineer? Absolutely not, but it’s fun to see what a poorly structured sentence that took 60 seconds to write can be turned into. I’ve enjoyed much of the output, and allContinue reading “Miss Big Booty Deschutee”

The Booger

I’ve done everything perfectly. Literally, absolutely, everything. The boy has just been fed a well-rounded and nutritional meal of fruits, vegetables, top-shelf breast milk (thank you, wife!), and eggs. He ought to be satiated for awhile. Merely minutes ago, his poop made a jailbreak out the rear passage of his diaper, requiring a full-body wipeContinue reading “The Booger”

A Letter To The Jabroni Doing Yoga In The Public Sauna

Dear Bikram Acolyte, C’mon man. What is your objective here? There are 13 of us packed into this sweaty bitch, and you are making twelve-thirteenths of the group feel weird and annoyed. Let me also remind you, in case through your yogic meditative practice you have transported your consciousness to a higher plane of existenceContinue reading “A Letter To The Jabroni Doing Yoga In The Public Sauna”

Aiming for Zero

Well, this post is not what I hoped it would be, and for that, I am sad. Sad. Very sad. Originally, I planned to come before you, dear reader, proud with accomplishment, but alas, I have not yet achieved my goal. However, as I’m closing in on this elusive feat, I feel it warranted toContinue reading “Aiming for Zero”

Kidding Myself No More

To put it charitably, our house has character (read: is an ancient shithole). This prehistoric archeological site I inhabit leaves me wanting many things, none more so than a dishwasher. No kidding, I easily spend, at minimum, 30 minutes every single day, standing in front of our too-small sink that holds approximately two bowls, becauseContinue reading “Kidding Myself No More”

Chatting With Chat GPT About The Band

The steamiest, moist-est, stankiest thing to do on the interweb right now is to talk with Open AI’s chatbot, Chat GPT. I figured I should say hi. Quick disclaimer: I have no insightful comments or opinions regarding this technology. Remember, I am a dummy. However, I will comment anyways, because that’s my right as anContinue reading “Chatting With Chat GPT About The Band”

What the F#%K is the Economy, Anyhow?

Every week without fail, a new issue of The Economist shows up in my mailbox, and every week without fail, I fail to read it. Well that’s not entirely accurate or fair to myself. I certainly fail to finish it. Often, in a desperate attempt to feel like I’m getting my money’s worth, I franticallyContinue reading “What the F#%K is the Economy, Anyhow?”

Taintenance

Coming at you HARDDD with another IP giveaway. This one is a big dollar idea, so put on a second pair of underpants and stay within 25 feet of a restroom, ‘cause I’m about to instigate some peristalsis in your ascending, transverse, descending, and sigmoid colon. Recently, my close friend Chris embarked on a South-to-NorthContinue reading “Taintenance”

My boyyy, Joe Biden

I come to you people (what do I mean, ‘you people’???) on this auspicious Wednesday to speak to the good news that hath descendedeth from thy heavens. This is no ordinary Wednesday, my fellow Americans. Today is a triumphant day that many of us lazy and entitled patriots have been praying (keyword: praying, not actuallyContinue reading “My boyyy, Joe Biden”

E-Meat Security

As I mentioned in a not-so-recent blog post, I’m participating in the Giving Pledge by giving away my IP. For the next installment honoring my commitment to society, I humbly present an investment opportunity/innovative technology that stands to radically transform the current state of food security.. If the past 6 months have renewed my faithContinue reading “E-Meat Security”

Bats Flyin’ Outta the Cave-The COVID (Almost) Marathon

In an effort to not feel like a loser, I resorted to my standard fix, go beat myself up for a few hours. In my view, exercise isn’t necessarily the most productive thing to do with your time, but at least at the end of it you can say you did something, and there’s someContinue reading “Bats Flyin’ Outta the Cave-The COVID (Almost) Marathon”

Feeling like a loser

baby, so why don’t you kill me? Because I know karate, bitch! Neck chop! Anyways… Such is the cycle of life, you have your ups, you have your downs. And this is a truth felt on multiple levels: in your sense of worldly standing, your physical health and well-being, as well as your mental constitution.Continue reading “Feeling like a loser”

“Wouldn’t it be nice if there was a knife in the top of the can?”

-Soulfully laments the great Andrew Dempsey-Karp in classic Squish Rat banger track, “Spread the Bologna.”  Just to explain a few things- Andrew is my friend, and Squish Rat is the dope band (or musical drinking club) we’re co-members of. We’re friggin’ legit. ‘Nuff said. Anyways, this question he poses in melodic verse refers to anotherContinue reading ““Wouldn’t it be nice if there was a knife in the top of the can?””

The Bush Classification System

Not saying I’m the first to consider such a thing, but a cursory search of the internet (i.e. the first first page of google results) suggests that no one has fully expounded on the nuances of bushwhacking, including it’s grade of difficulty/frustration, as well as some of the inventive techniques one might employ to wadeContinue reading “The Bush Classification System”

Plotline: Cumnami (pronounced Come-Nah-Me)

Here is where I ruin this blog by writing something so immature that there’s no path of redemption going forward. It must be done though. This post is an expression of some part of me. The very crude and childish part, but a part of me, nonetheless. Better to share and regret, than repress creativity,Continue reading “Plotline: Cumnami (pronounced Come-Nah-Me)”

In defense of climbing the unassuming lump instead of the taller, more noteworthy and majestic peak next door

I originally had the inspiration to write this post almost two years ago, but I’m lazy, so you know, it didn’t happen. Well, here I am two years later, with a vague memory of why I wanted to write such a post. I’ll do my best to peer back into the foggy, obscured recesses ofContinue reading “In defense of climbing the unassuming lump instead of the taller, more noteworthy and majestic peak next door”

Arugula: Supreme Ruler of Greens

Out of all the cruciferous, leafy green offerings, arugula stands petiole and blade above them all (Yes, I googled the anatomy of a leaf. No, of course I don’t casually know such terms).  On some level, I feel this fact is already known among many, yet has managed to remain a quiet truth, tacitly accepted.Continue reading “Arugula: Supreme Ruler of Greens”

Why do artists kill themselves?

Maybe it’s because their art sucks. Maybe it doesn’t, and they’re just self-critical. Or maybe they just realize it doesn’t really mean anything. I mean, even if you happened to be a wildly successful sculptor, and you’d been lauded and praised by society for years, maybe decades, and you’d made a living off your craft,Continue reading “Why do artists kill themselves?”